CAFOD writer Mark Chamberlain is currently visiting our work in Nicaragua. He has been in the north of the country with our partner, ASOMUPRO. One of the aims of ASOMUPRO is to help women in the region to get nutritious food to eat. The beekeeping project in the video gives the women honey – essential nutrition – and a source of income.
Tag Archives: women
16 days of activism: what can we do?
Gender violence can affect anyone, and does affect whole communities. Please help us to end it.
Joy works full time in CAFOD’s London office, and believes passionately in facing and ending gender violence. Her name has been changed to protect her family and friends. Reading the stories and watching the videos from AVEGA east this year, I’ve been so moved by both the honesty and the incredible strength of women who have suffered sexual violence. But I have to say, the account that moved me most was Eileen, who talked about the young woman who approached her in the middle of London, in an art gallery, to talk about her experiences.
Please act now to end gender based violence>
Sexual and gender based violence is not something that happens elsewhere, to other people. One in three women worldwide will experience it in their lifetime. But what does that mean? It means if you think of all the women you know, chances are one of them will have experienced some form of sexual violence. It could happen to your sister. It could happen to your best friend. It could happen to you.
It happened to me.
A few years ago I found myself in a violent relationship. I was a bright, intelligent, loving young woman. I studied at one of the best universities, I had (and still have) a supportive and loving family and lots of friends.I was someone who opened her heart (and home) to someone who took advantage of those things. After a while, I found myself doing and saying things I would never have seen myself doing. I became secretive. I started cutting off my family and friends, because I was ashamed of what was happening. I thought it was my fault. I find it hard to recognise myself, looking back on that time. I lost my confidence, I became clinically depressed, something which I still deal with now. It has taken a lot of therapy, prayer, and a very understanding and supportive husband, family and friends, to put things back together.
Please give so that CAFOD can help survivors of gender based violence>
I thankfully managed to get away from that relationship (if you can call it that) and rebuild my life. It wasn’t easy, and even though I’m now married to a very wonderful, kind, supportive man, my past can still come back and haunt us sometimes.
Why am I telling you this? Because I want you to know that sexual violence is something that happens, every day, in every country in the world. It doesn’t just happen to poor women, or uneducated women, or isolated women, or women who live overseas. It happens to any women, any time.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a man hater. As I said, I have an incredible husband. I have wonderful brothers and my dad was an absolute hero. I have lots of friends, male and female who treat everyone with the respect they’re entitled to as human beings. There is a lot of good in the world, and I truly believe that most people are decent and good.
But we can’t let that blind us to people’s suffering. We can’t let the fact that it’s easier to turn a blind eye stop us from seeing the people who have experienced this terrible violence, either at the hands of strangers, or even worse, from family members, friends or partners.
Please pray for people who experience sexual and gender based violence>
Sexual violence is a particularly pernicious form of violence, because it violates the most private and sacred thing about you. It undermines everything you thought you knew about yourself. My abuse didn’t happen in a forest or a war zone. It wasn’t at the hands of a stranger. But my heart goes out to those women Avega East helps, because I understand a little of what it takes to rebuild yourself from the inside out, to re-evaluate everything you thought you knew about yourself, because in one fell swoop somebody took that from you. I’m praying, from the bottom of my soul for every person, woman, man or child, who has suffered this terrible abuse – at any level.
I’m asking you to join me in making sure 16 days of activism doesn’t just last for 16 days. I’m asking you to join me in giving, acting and praying until we have eradicated this abuse in every country in the world. I’m asking you to stand with people around the world who have to find the strength to put their lives back together after everything that is precious to them has been undermined or taken away.
The donations you make to CAFOD really do enable this vital work. The evidence is there for all to see. By taking the solidarity action, you can show your support for bringing an end to gender based violence, you can make a statement that you will not keep quiet about this issue. And by praying, you can bring hope to the millions who are affected, and ask God to strengthen us as we keep fighting for a solution.
Please don’t stop now. We CAN end this.
Gender violence affects all of us. Please take action with CAFOD to end it once and for all>
Filed under 16 Days, 16 Days 2012, UK
16 days of activism: Edna Wharton, CAFOD supporter
Edna Wharton
I became a CAFOD volunteer in the 1980s and then our parish representative. I’ve kept records since 1996 of money we’ve raised, and when I look back I’m inspired that we really can do something. We can change things together.
But it’s not just about money. We can do very little without money, but we also need to take action as well as donate. Signing petitions, going on peaceful demonstrations, lobbying your MP: all these things make a difference too. I’ve also gone into schools and talked to people in the street to raise awareness.
In the 1990s we had a new parish priest – Patrick Tansy. Fr Tansy was a supporter of CAFOD.
He talked about Rwanda at the time of the genocide. His account really moved me. He was an inspiration – he really spelt out to us in his homilies what was going on.
How do you come back after the genocide? When you’ve lost your husband, your family, your property, your job, your business…how do you carry on?
So it seemed natural to take up this cause. I can’t believe we can hear about anyone who’s suffering or being persecuted – that we can be aware and not do anything about it. In the Bible we’re told that they are our brothers and sisters. We can’t just let it pass us by.
Not a lot happened straight away, but when Connect2 came along it seemed like the perfect opportunity for us. Many of our parishioners are older and we remember the genocide happening. We also have a lot of parishioners from overseas – many of them have seen similar things and experienced hardships in their home countries so I think we have a natural connection to this story. Our parish is now a Connect 2 Rwanda parish, so we hear quite a lot about Musha and the work of AVEGA East.
Last year Odette came to meet us and other parishes in our area. We organised a joint luncheon so she could come and share her story with us.
It was wonderful to meet Odette. She came and had lunch with us and she was so inspiring. She told us her story: how a group of ladies helped her through the trauma of losing her husband in the genocide and losing her home and business. These ladies helped her recover her self confidence and gave her tremendous support, getting her back into work and helping to re-house her family. They helped her children to recover too. Odette decided to join them and help other women in similar circumstances – and that is how AVEGA began.
It’s incredible how Odette helps people. When she was speaking to us about the genocide, I was thinking: “but all this happened 18 years ago” – and yet here she was talking about it as if it had happened only yesterday. That’s what we have to understand. Trauma takes a long time to get over – not one year or two…but eventually you can heal.
Even in this country there are stories of women being trafficked and abused. I think: How can the human race stoop so low? But then women like Odette – they show such courage to stand up and stand out on this issue. They are so committed to their community – even the UN has recognised their work.
It is so important to tackle sexual violence. We’re all different – some of us are rich, some are poor; some of us are outgoing, some are shy or vulnerable. But we’re not that different. There’s no excuse for anyone to be violated or taken advantage of. It’s the human race gone mad when this happens. Why do we do it – and why do we turn a blind eye to it? We wouldn’t allow this to happen to our mother, our daughter or son…why do we allow it to happen to our sisters and brothers around the world?
Everyone deserves a voice; everyone deserves respect. We’ve let people down – I feel this very strongly. We should not only help them by sending money but also by taking action – to make sure people are educated, trained and strengthened. Which is what CAFOD does – CAFOD makes sure the help and the funds reach the right people – the people who really need them.
Each year, we support the global campaign, 16 days of activism against gender violence. This year, we’re telling the story of how we can work to end sexual violence from 16 different perspectives – be it from survivors of violence, the partners who work with them, the journalists who tell their stories, or the supporters and activists who fund and publicise our work to end violence against women.
Filed under 16 Days, 16 Days 2012, CAFOD
16 days of activism: Sarah Davison
Sarah is a writer and journalist who worked with CAFOD for several years. During that time she travelled to Musha and met the women of Avega East. She made this film about her time there.
Filed under 16 Days, 16 Days 2012, CAFOD
16 days of activism: Liberty Muhoza
- Liberty Muhoza
Liberty Muhoza was left orphaned by the 1994 genocide in Rwanda. His brother was also killed. With support from AVEGA, Liberty is finishing his education and has also become a community development worker.
I live with nine other orphaned children in my house. I am the oldest. They’re my brothers and sisters now. I am the head of my household.
I’ve been doing house building today. For me, it’s a charity action – a way of helping others in your community. It’s a way of putting energy into helping people who can’t help themselves.
I helped to build my own house along with other children AVEGA helps. CAFOD provided the roofing, doors and windows.
I was just five when the President was killed in 1994. I didn’t understand what this news would mean. I didn’t understand the consequences of death then.
But within a few hours a gang came to our house. They started cutting some of our relatives and burning houses. They killed all the cows that were in our compound. My parents ran in one direction and I ran in another.
I went into the bush and I saw my mum holding my baby brother. A murderer took the baby and threw him into the air and he was cut in two by a machete. When I saw that I ran into a maize field and hid amongst the tall plants. I sat down and stayed there all night. It rained and I got soaked to my skin but I didn’t move.
The next day I walked to my primary school and I saw lots of mothers and children inside. I stayed there the night and felt safe but the next day a gang of men took us and threw us down a toilet pit. They didn’t cut us or beat us, they just threw us away.
We were in the pit for about a week. We were asking the people who walked past the pit to kill us because we didn’t want to wait to die.
After the genocide, life made no sense. There was nobody there to take care of me, give me an education and love me. I felt like my life had lost all meaning.
I was taken in by a family but they treated me like a small slave. I knew one of my aunties was alive so I found her. She told me all her children had been killed. I moved into her house when I was ten and she took good care of me.
I went back to school but I was too numb with grief to learn at first. When I was 13 I started at secondary school. Then my auntie died and I was alone again.
At the beginning I wasn’t interested in AVEGA. I thought they would be like others who had come, taken our stories, then left without giving us any help.
But they continued to visit me and help me, and I realised they were doing good things – not like the others. I started to believe in them.
I am an orphan and AVEGA is always near me, giving me affection and help like a parent would.
AVEGA trained me to identify the signs of trauma in people and to listen to them. The training has helped me be tolerant and receptive to other people’s problems. I know I’m not the only one who has suffered.
The counselling I got from AVEGA has helped me feel less isolated and learn to trust others. It helped me understand that I am not the only one suffering. It gave me the energy to cope with my life. I was encouraged to take responsibility of my life and realise that my main wealth is to learn. So I must learn and continue learning until the day I die!
I work hard at school. I am first in my class for every subject. I hope I am a role model. I try to do my best so my brothers and sisters in my house can follow me and learn from me.
At secondary school I’m studying human sciences (sociology, economics) business and accounting and interpretation. I only have one year to go. I go back to school for my final term in January 2010.
Genocide happens because of a lack of love. Love, unity and hard work will bring people together and create peace. We must overcome our history. The colonial powers said that Tutsis were not Rwandese and did not deserve respect. This led to many, many problems.
I have been relieved from my sorrow. When we meet and talk together it makes us happier. We show love for each other and care about each other’s feelings. Most of us have been deprived this love. I feel love for everyone and I wish them peace. I hope everyone works hard and progresses in their life.
If we all work hard and put our energies together, we can build a strong future in Rwanda. We never want a repeat of what happened in 1994.
Each year, we support the global campaign, 16 days of activism against gender violence. This year, we’re telling the story of how we can work to end sexual violence from 16 different perspectives – be it from survivors of violence, the partners who work with them, the journalists who tell their stories, or the supporters and activists who fund and publicise our work to end violence against women.
Filed under 16 Days 2012, CAFOD
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